


Reflections

by Chrimson_Bonez



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Angst, F/M, Forgiveness, Hurt/Comfort, Self-Hatred, everyone else is mentioned like once lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-13 21:12:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12992631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chrimson_Bonez/pseuds/Chrimson_Bonez
Summary: Robin faces an interesting person after she sacrifices herself to defeat Grima.





	Reflections

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this all in like... one go at 2 am. I just couldn't get it out of my head, so I decided to take a very quick break from the Dragon AU fic and get this idea out of my head. Please enjoy some good old late night Chrobin angst.

Darkness was all Robin was able to see, even though she was sure that her eyes were open. She was lying on her stomach, still dressed in her battle tactician attire, and her bangs stuck to her forehead from sweat. She slowly pressed her hands onto the strange surface and heaved herself onto her knees, still confused about where exactly she was. When she glanced down at her left hand as it gripped her pants, her heart stopped for a moment when she realized her wedding band was no longer resting on her ring finger, and the memories of her actions suddenly came rushing back.

She remembered how she waited for her husband, Chrom, to exit their shared tent before she discretely pulled the ring off her finger and gently placed it on the table next to their cot. She hated having to do it behind his back, but she had told him that she would let him deal the final blow. It was a lie, of course; she couldn’t allow the Fell Dragon to have a chance of coming back into the world again. Not when she could end the vicious cycle once and for all. He called for her when she was taking so long to leave the tent, and she quickly slipped her gloves on and followed him into battle on last time.

A tear rolled down her cheek as she recalled Chrom running to her dissolving body after she shoved him aside and killed Grima with her own hands. He frantically called her name, over and over, begging her to stay with him.

 _Please, Robin,_ he cried, _Don’t go where I can’t follow!_

“May we meet again,” she echoed, “in a better life…” Her hands quickly clasped over her mouth, desperately trying to keep herself from crying, but the tears continued to spill down her face and over her slender fingers. 

A loud footstep from behind rattled Robin from her thoughts, and caused her to scramble to her feet and turn around to face whatever it was. her heart skipped another beat, and her tears quickly dried as anger began to burn in her belly. A few feet from her, standing in the same void as her, was her doppelganger.

“Grima,” she growled. The other woman flinched at the name, and quickly shook her head as she clenched her own hands together, as if trying to create some sort of invisible wall between herself and that word.

“N-No,” she corrected, “Grima is… long gone… I’m Robin. Er… the other one. The _real_ other one.”

“And how do I know that,” Robin questioned, “How do you expect me to simply trust your word on that?!” The other Robin looked away, chewing on her bottom lip nervously as her hands clenched each other harder.

“…I don’t blame you for not trusting me,” she responded, “I… can’t really prove anything…” She chanced a glance at the other woman, and her eyes were still filled with distrust and anger towards her. It was a feeling she had long since gone numb to, but seeing such fiery hatred over her very existence once again reopened old and painful memories…

Her husband lying in a pool of his own blood, as the lightening blade she had summoned from her own palm disappeared, leaving the wound through abdomen wide open, ensuring his death. She knelt beside him, her own trousers beginning to stain red as she frantically shook his shoulder in a fatal attempt to wake him up. She cried out his name, but his body remained still. The violet flames separating them from the rest of the Shepherds began to dissolve, and soon the others began to approach them. But the presence inside her mind began to scratch her brain once again, begging to be free to destroy every last one of those weak humans. She shouted for the other party to stay back as she tried to fight back Grima one last time. Tears rolled down her cheeks as her shaky fingers unlatched Falchion from Chrom’s corpse. She tried to steal a glance from the others, trying to find anyone who could at least take the legendary blade back home. Her entire body went numb when she saw the cold and piercing gazes of all her former comrades and friends, their anger directed straight at her.

 _They hate you,_ the voice whispered, _You’re a monster, and you’re all alone…_ She screamed, angry at herself for being so weak, heartbroken over the loss of everyone she ever loved, and furious that this voice in her head was right. She no longer had a place in the world.

Somehow, she still managed to gain enough strength to throw Falchion at the group, and Frederick quickly bent down to grab the sacred blade, never taking his piercing gaze off her.

 _P-please,_ she begged, _My children… take them… somewhere safe… a-and hidden…_ She never received a confirmation from the group if they would fulfill her final request, as her own consciousness faded away, allowing the dark presence to at last fully take control of her body.

“…want?” The voice of her other self pulled her back into the darkness she now occupied. She looked up at her, confused.

“What do you want?” The other Robin growled again. She didn’t have time to deal with a weaker version of herself; she had to find a way back to her home, back to Chrom and the others.

“I wanted,” she began, “I wanted… to thank you. For doing what I could not.” A smiled began to tug on the corner of her lips, despite the sadness and regret that swallowed her heart. She looked up when the other woman didn’t respond, and she decided to use that as her cue to continue.

“I wasn’t strong enough, back then,” she went on, “I… couldn’t fight off Grima’s control. I couldn’t protect my family… I… I even kill-“

“Stop,” the other interrupts, “Just… just stop… how could you have just, given up like that?! How could you let that monster control you-“

“You weren’t there,” She shouts, “When you jutted that lightening bolt into Chrom’s ribs, you knew that it wasn’t going to kill him! You knew ahead of time! I didn’t! I had to watch my other half crumble and die, all because I… I…” she gasped, trying to catch her breath. Instead, she finally let her tears run free, the guilt washing over her as Chrom’s limp body continuously flashed before her eyes, until she felt a hand gently grip her shoulder. She looked up, and saw her stronger self look at her with less anger, perhaps replaced more with pity. She wasn’t sure, since it had been so long since someone gazed at her with anything but hate-filled eyes.

“…I only knew what to do because of you,” she admitted, “Your memories… they came to me as nightmares… and I also had Lucina to help as well.” At the mention of her daughter’s name, all concern of her own wellbeing disappeared.

“She was safe, right,” she quickly asked, “her and Morgan? They were okay?” Robin gave her other self a quick nod.

“Y-Yes… they made it back in time in one piece. Lucina was strong and brave as ever, and Morgan had one of the sharpest minds I had ever seen. I… did everything in my power to protect them.” She decided to leave her son’s amnesia out in order to let her have some sort of comfort. It seemed like she desperately needed it.

“Good,” she murmured as her small grin returned, “Good, good… I’m glad their new mother was able to do what I could not…” Her last statement shocked Robin, but she knew that it wasn’t meant to be an insult to her; it was supposed to berate and punish herself for her mistakes in her own timeline. She opened her mouth to say something else, until she felt an odd tug on her hand. The other Robin must have noticed her reaction too, for she gently nudged her hand off her shoulder and stepped away.

“It’s time for you to go home,” she said somberly. Robin wanted to ask her what she meant by that, until she felt the tug again, this time even stronger than before. It was beginning to pull her away.

“I-If you could,” her other version muttered before she left, “Tell Lucina and Morgan… that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect them… but that I still love them. I love them so much…” Robin couldn’t respond, the urge to leave so strong it was a wonder that she was managing to stay where she was to listen.

“I understand if you don’t want to tell them,” she went on, “I’m sure they won’t care about what I think… I don’t blame them. I just… I want them to know…” It was the last thing Robin heard until she was yanked away, her vision turning all white as what felt like wind began rushing past her body.

 

* * *

 

 

Robin couldn’t help but cry as Chrom pulled her up and wrapped his strong arms around her frame. She clenched the dark blue fabric of his tunic tightly, afraid that if she let go he would disappear and be replaced with the vast void she was previously in. She could hear his breath fluttering as he tried to hold back his own tears.

“Welcome back,” he muttered in her ear, “it’s over now.” He cupped her cheek in his gloved hand, and as she instinctively leaned her head into his touch, he pressed his lips against her own, as if kissing her would solidify the fact that, after two long years, she was finally home.

Everyone welcomed her home when Chrom finally brought her back to Ylisstol. Lissa gladly squeezed the tactician in a tight bear hug, relieved that her sister-in-law was finally back. Maribelle came running up to her, clasping her hands and demanding an apology for making her worry for so long. Sumia held a flower out to her, explaining how her latest pedal fortune said that she would be back today. Stahl excitedly told her about all the new recipes he had discovered while she was gone, and quickly compiled a list of all the ones she simply had to try. Libra gently placed his latest drawing in her hands, explaining that it was his welcome home gift to her.

While she enjoyed seeing all of her friends once again, her eyes continued to scan the barracks for two familiar mops of blue hair, until she finally saw them race through the doorway and pull her into a tight hug. She hugged Morgan and Lucina back, tears starting to run down her face again after being reunited with her children once more. After what had felt like hours, she finally let go of them, and smiled.

“I’m so glad to see you, Mother,” Lucina smiled as she wiped away her own tears. Hearing that sent a jolt through Robin’s heart as she remembered her encounter with her other self in the void. In that moment, she wondered if she should share her message to her children. It hurt to remember that she wasn’t their real mother, and telling them what their real mother had said would be a strong reminder to the children that both of their real parents were gone for good. But…

 _They deserve to know,_ she sadly thought to herself.

She pulled her children outside, with Chrom quickly following her and their children. She didn’t try to tell him to stay. She knew he wouldn’t listen, and he had been stuck to her like a bur ever since he plucked her from the field once more. Besides, he could act as her anchor, a source of comfort as she tried to explain what had happened while she was gone.

“When… I was, erm, gone,” Robin explained, “All I could see around me was… darkness. It was just a void of nothing, until I saw her. The other me.” She could feel the air still as her family froze. She looked towards Chrom, and his eyebrows had risen at her comment.

“I thought you destroyed Grima for good,” he said. Robin nodded.

“I-I did,” she went on, “She was… I suppose she was trapped alongside Grima all this time. But, after destroying him, she must have finally been freed.” Lucina gasped, and one of her hands quickly covered her mouth, attempting to hold her tears. Her mother was alive all this time… but trapped. A prisoner of the Fell Dragon…

Robin glanced at Morgan, and his eyes were as wide as saucers, his mouth hanging open, much like how Chrom’s tended to do so when he was shocked.

“She… wanted me to tell you both something.” At that, both of the royal siblings looked up at Robin, watching her intently with bated breath. She let out a shaky sigh. It was too late to back out now.

“She… wanted you to know how sorry she was,” she explained to them, “She felt like she failed you. But… she also wanted you both to know how much she loved you, and that she’s glad that your lives can now be filled with peace.” There was a long moment of silence between them all, until Lucina fell to her knees, unable to hold her tears back anymore. Morgan quickly knelt down, tears steadily streaming down his own face as he tried to console his older sister by rubbing small circles on her back.

“G-Gods,” she sobbed, “She… I can’t… she suffered for so long…” she tried wiping her tears away again, but new ones quickly took their place. She looked up at Chrom and Robin, and smiled.

“Thank you, Mother,” she muttered, “Thank you… thank you so much…”

Robin wondered if the other version of herself could see them now, somehow. She hoped that, in some way, she could find some comfort in knowing that her children still loved her, and that they accepted her message with open arms.

 

* * *

 

 

The black void continued to stretch on as she walked forward. She saw nothing besides herself and darkness ever since the other Robin was pulled back to her time, back to her family and friends. A pang of jealousy shot through her chest, but it was quickly stifled when she reminded herself that the other Robin deserved to go home. She didn’t give in to Grima, and she deserves to live beside her husband and watch her children grow in a peaceful world.

Her, though? This Robin that continued to wander the endless darkness? Ha!

“This… is what I deserve,” she murmured to herself. And she wholeheartedly believed it. She killed her other half, destroyed her friends, and forced her own children into a world of bloodshed and ruin. She was just as much a monster as Grima. After all, it was her body the Fell Dragon used as a vessel. Surely she carried as much responsibility, right? It was only fair that she should wander all alone for all eternity. However, that was not what happened.

Her eyebrows lifted in confusion when she saw a small dot of light in the darkness. It soon began to grow bigger and bigger, until Robin realized that it wasn’t growing itself, she was running towards it. But… why? Why was she so drawn to it? Why had it appeared to begin with?

Eventually, the light swallowed her. Her eyes scrunched shut at the sudden brightness, and she felt a light breeze brush against her skin as leaves sighed in the trees all around her. She blinked, trying to get her eyes to focus. Her breath hitched when she realized she was in a forest clearing, surrounded by trees and beautiful wild flowers. The sky was clear, perfect for the few birds that sang as they fluttered by. Panic began to rush through her body.

Had she been sent back by mistake? She could’ve sworn that the other Robin was being tugged back in the void by the bonds she shared with her family and friends.

 _My ties were severed long ago_ , she thought to herself. She had no connections left. They were gone forever… so how did this happen?

“…Robin?”

A voice she remembered better than her own called to her. She froze, but quickly willed herself to turn around and face him. She… had to explain that she was the wrong Robin, that a mistake was made, that she didn’t deserve to have a second chance…

Chrom stood before her, his eyes filled with relief at the sight of her. But hers were filled with shock and regret when she saw that the fatal wound she had given him was still there, his blue tunic stained red around the gash. When he noticed what she was staring at, he quickly approached her, his hands stretched out to hold her once more, but she backed away as fast as she could.

How cruel the gods were, making her relive her worst memory. But then again, she deserved it. She deserved to suffer for all time, to drown in her sorrows and pain as payment for what she had done. But Chrom… Chrom should have ascended. He should be allowed to rest, not to be punished like her. She fell on her knees, tears rolling down her face.

“Why are you here?” she wept. Chrom stood back a bit, giving her the space she wanted, even though he yearned to hold her close once more.

“…I was waiting for you,” he answered plainly. Robin simply shook her head in response.

“No,” she argued, “No, you should be resting! You shouldn’t be here, stuck with me! I… what I did was unforgivable!” He sighed and knelt in the grass near her, but he didn’t reach out to her. Not yet, at least.

“My love,” he muttered, “it was never your fault-“

“But it was,” she loudly interrupted, “If only I had been stronger, smarter somehow, I could have saved you! I could’ve prevented all this from happening! I should’ve-“ Chrom’s lips pressed against hers, quickly silencing her even as he pulled back. One of his hands gripped her shoulder, while the other moved to cover the gaping wound on his abdomen. He wanted her to look him in the eyes.

“Robin,” he said, “Robin, please, look at me.” She bit her lower lip, but finally listened to him and gave him a nervous look.

“I love you,” he confessed, “I always have, and I always will. I’ve been waiting for so long to reunite with you, my love.”

“But… why,” she asked between sobs, “How could… how could you still say that, after everything I-“

“You weren’t responsible,” he cut her off again as he pulled her into a tight embrace, “You… you suffered just as much as any of us. Please… don’t blame yourself. I too have had a long time to wonder what I could have done differently.” He pulled away slightly, and instead reached to hold her hands. They were always so much smaller compared to his own…

“We can finally rest now, Robin,” he smiled, “won’t you join me?” She stared longingly into his cool blue eyes, and nodded. After so long, she allowed herself to feel relief, and perhaps think that she wasn’t the monster Grima convinced her she thought she was. Perhaps… she, too, could be free from his grasp. Free to rest alongside her other half, instead of suffering alone for the rest of time. She still felt like she didn’t deserve to be with him again, but her own toxic thoughts were quickly silenced when he gently pressed his forehead against hers.

“You are the wind at my back and the sword at my side,” he murmured. She smiled warmly, allowing herself to finally enjoy the sound of his voice once more.

“Two halves of a whole.”

**Author's Note:**

> If there are any confusing parts or typos please don't be afraid to let me know. Like I said, I wrote this all in one go, and didn't send it to anyone for proofreading beforehand. Probably should have... but here we are. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed, and constructive criticism is always welcomed.


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